My firstborn got her first passport this year and this week left with her youth group to Costa Rica.
I was thrilled for her.
And not all that emotional about her leaving.
But the day she left I decided I may have thought I was braver than I actually am. When I see her phone lying on the table I am reminded I can't call her.
When I see her car in the drive I get excited thinking she's home!
And then I remember she's gone.
I am a little bit of more of a baby than some.
But I miss her presence in our home.
I miss her smiles and hugs and her help.
I miss her friendship. And she's only been gone 2 days!
The thought hit me in bed last night... This is how it will be all the time in a year from now. YIKES!! I hate having those scary thoughts when I'm trying to sleep.
The truth is.
My time is almost up and I'm not ready. But I'm not sure I ever would be.
I remember her leaving for school way back at the beginning... Realizing our family unit would change with her absence every day. And it did.
So while I'm thankful for these giant new places she is going... My heart feels a little tug.
I can't wait to see this face in a few days.
I believe God will use this trip to grow her up in some tremendous ways!