Thursday, April 30, 2009

Would you tell me if I had stinky breath?!

Do you ever wonder what people really say about you when you aren't there.
Like if you leave the party first does everybody start talking about you?
I mean, I know that sounds really insecure.
No, really, it's very insecure.
But sometimes I just get this feeling like if I am not bodily present here these people will finally be able to say what they really think.

Don't you wish sometimes we could just say it?

Like kids ....

Like when I try to obscurely give them a slight pinch in church to help remind them of their zoo like behavior in a non zoo environment, and they make a contorted face and yell, "ouch! Stop pinching me!"
Or when we are in a restaurant and a large lady is sitting at the next booth, and they can't stop staring at her as she gets up to leave. And I glare at them as they stare at her, cautioning them not to stare. So they ask me loudly. "Did you see that lady?"
What about when I hear them tell their friends. "Your breath stinks". And then they continue playing.
See it's about courage and compassion.
Not that I think I should go around belting out whatever crosses my mind.
But sometimes I should learn to courageously say what needs to be said to a friends face.
Let's be honest, sometimes their breath does stink.
Would you want to know?
I would!
So why wouldn't they?
The compassion comes in with my attitude.
If I have a" love ya sista " kind of approach it makes the words less harsh.
I don't know.... it's touchy.... but I wish I could be like a child in this sometimes!

What do you think?
Would you want to know?


  1. worse off, i'd wanna know about the booger on my nose. a true friend (in my book) tells you like it is...WITH LOVE and if you are their true take it as it is and LOVE them back!

    now go buy some breath mints!

  2. Man, that is a hard one. I love that kids are so able to be honest, but I think honesty with adults tends to come across differently. Maybe more offensive? I guess adults can be more subtle though if they wanted to. Like if you had stinky breath, I could just smile and hand you a breath mint :). No need to say, "Rose! Your breath stinks!" But some things I would really like a friend to tell me. Like if I had my skirt tucked into my nylons in the back, or if I had a big green piece of food in my teeth and I was smiling and meeting new people. I think telling someone those things isn't as hard as telling them they have a hygeine issue like stinky breath or stinky pits. I wonder why that is?

  3. Yeah...don't actually "tell" me just offer gum or a mint.

  4. yeah...just offer me some gum. I'm pretty sensitive so I may shed a tear depending on where I'm at in my cycle...if you tell me that my breath stinks. Now do you want me to tell you? Or just ask you if you want a mint? And what if you say no...should I push you into taking a mint?

    I'm with you on the kids saying things better left unsaid. I'm lucky Isabella is so quiet and shy. Never happens that she can say it too loud. Now Jack...the boy humbles me ALL OF THE TIME.

  5. That is a hard one. Saying "you have stinky breath" is something my hubby would say to me, and even that offends me. I like it better when he just hands me a "mint" in church. It is kinda like saying, "you are fat." Some words are better left unsaid unless they have the best interest of the person in mind.


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